My Favorite Primate

From: DumDum Sucka


I was the type of kid who got As in Art, English, Creative Writing, but I would flunk classes like Geometry and Biology. I just wasnt smart in those areas.

In the classes I wasnt smart in, I would screw around a lot and get into trouble.

What made matters worse, was that in Biology, I shared a class with my hell-raising best friend. We were so wild, passing notes, drawing penises and vaginas all over our assignments...basically goofing off and having fun, that we didnt even pay attention to our in-class assignments and discussions.

Our teacher quickly caught on to what we were up to. I had been so busy writing sexually explicit stuff in a note to my friend, that I had not heard a word of what the teacher had said.

"L*******!" he shouted. He called my name out, and I mustve jumped a mile high. "Yessssss," I answered, trying to pretend I wasnt scared to death. "So tell me," he said, "whats your favorite primate?"

I racked my brain, trying to think of what a primate was. I had no idea!!!!! I tried to think of something witty to say, and all I could come up with was, "Well, I dont have a favorite primate. I like them all!"

My teacher kind of mocked me and made me feel stupid. "Mmm-hmmm!!!! What about monkeys and gorillas?! Those are MY favorite primates!"

I just said, "Yeah, mine too."

I was not only embarrassed because I was caught not paying attention, but I shouldve known what a primate was! I was in 11th grade!

It was pretty embarrassing, and the looks the serious students gave me was motivation enough to start trying harder in class!

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