Fart Face

School

Well you know that everyone has embarrassing moments... whether you are so humiliated you can barely speak, or whether you are laughing at yourself. I could tell you embarrassing moments from my junior high or high school experiences, but they arent as embarrassing as the one that I remember so clearly from the fifth grade. I was only ten or so when it happened, but it was just mortifying. At that point in my life, education was taught to every class in their own classroom the entire schoolday. I came to school on "Social Studies Day" (a day when each person had to share a paragraph of research they did the night before) armed with my info on the history of April Fools Day.

When it came my turn to present, I went up to the front of the room and began to read in excitement, happy as I was in my discoveries. Now I cant remember exactly what was said, but I know what the research was, so I will put it into my own words now: "April Fools Day originally started in France. Long ago the new year began in April in France, and when they changed the start of the year to January, those who still celebrated the New Year on April first were known as "April Fools"..." I read and read. I was having a great time; as a child I loved to be the center of attention and share unknown facts with my classmates. When I got to the last part, the most mischevious and to me then, hilarious, part about how French people celebrate the holiday today, something unexpected happened: "French children today celebrate April Fools by drawing their own colorful fish and then sticking them on unsuspecting backs. If a person walks around without the slightest idea that they have a fish on their back, they are an April Fool."

But just as I was reciting the last two words of my research, a fart that I had never even felt coming crept right out and BOOOOOM, it exploded so loudly it surprised even me. Instead of being applauded, my class burst into peels of laughter; they pointed at me and made fun of me. Even though I couldnt smell a thing, as I walked back to my desk, red faced, they held their noses and snickered.

For two years everyone called me "Fart Face", even my closest friends. Once later in fifth grade I heard my own teacher chuckle and say quietly, "Fart Face Maria, may I have your homework assignment?"

So theres my most embarrassing moment for you! I shared that story with my husband and he laughed so hard he farted right there himself!!