The Princess and the Pee

From: Emily

During my junior year in high school, I had a part in a school play. My character was a fairy princess, and my costume was basically just glittery leotards. As with any leotards, I couldn't wear anything underneath them, and I'd have to pull the whole thing down to my ankles in order to use the restroom. Needless to say, this made bathroom breaks very awkward, so I'd usually try to drink as little as possible on performance days. Unfortunately, though, I broke my own rule at the worst possible time -- during the final performance. That last performance was "The Big Day" -- the day on which teachers, students, parents, siblings, and other family members would all be in attendance.

To celebrate the event, our theater teacher brought us cake and soft-drinks beforehand. And because I'm an idiot who can't resist free stuff, I ended up drinking several sodas shortly before the start of the play. While giving my performance, I could feel the pressure building in my bladder, but somehow I thought that I'd be able to hold it in until the end. By act 3, though, I was in serious pain, and I knew that I couldn't wait any longer. During a brief section in which my character wasn't on stage, I took the opportunity to hurry to the nearest bathroom...but it was occupied! At that point, I was a second away from peeing in my leotards. There was no way I could wait any longer, so I desperately began searching for an unoccupied room in which I could relieve myself. Just behind the stage, I found a small, dark, dusty storage room. In my desperation, it seemed like the perfect place for me. So I went into a corner and pulled my leotards down to my ankles. Before I could begin peeing, though, I realized that I was at risk of splashing urine on my costume, so I pulled my leotard off entirely, and tossed them onto a nearby chair. (I was now totally naked.) I thought I'd finally have a chance to pee, but before I could start, I heard someone approaching. It was my theater teacher, and he was saying, "Emily! Where the hell are you?! It's almost time for you to go back onstage!" It sounded like he was about to enter the room. At this point, my fear, my embarrassment, and the pain in my bladder had completely addled my thinking. Nearby, there was a door to what I thought was a closet. Somehow, I thought that I'd be able to hide in there until my teacher left. So I opened the door and rushed through...but it wasn't a closet. I was now ON THE STAGE! As soon as I saw the rows and rows of people staring at me, I completely froze, and my mind went blank. I could not move, or think, or even breathe. I didn't even have enough sense to run away or cover myself. I just stood there completely exposed, and I was vaguely aware of shocked gasps and murmurs coming from the audience. At that point, my poor bladder just couldn't take it any more, and I began peeing.

As I write this, I can feel a sense of numb horror as I remember that experience. Everyone was staring at me, and I was totally, totally, naked...with my own urine running uncontrollably down my legs. I could faintly hear someone in the audience saying, "Is she...pissing on herself? Oh my God, she is!" The gasps and murmurs became much louder. I don't really know what happened after that, because I fainted.

From then on, I was the laughing stock of the school.

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